In a league that has the roid ragers, convicted felons, and this guy……
……it’s tough to imagine a crime so unspeakable that it warrants a stiff warning of a $15,000 fine.
So what is it that is so heinous, so horrific, so God awful that the National Football League throw the war hammer of justice upon the soul of the unclean?
It’s a hat.
I mean, it’s a San Francisco Giants hat. That pretty much makes sense since Alex Smith is the quarterback of the SAN FRANCISCO Forty-Niners and all. And let’s not forget that Smith wore the hat last year when, you know, the Giants were not about to win the National League West title. But apparently it is now an issue, and the loving father and husband needs to re-up his NFL street cred by going to Centerfolds to make it rain, hire a gang of hookers for a session of unprotected group sex, and then murder one of them with his best friends to create a prolonged court case that might smear the entire sport.
And do it all without the Giants cap. Dammit.