Sunday, May 29, 2011

Coach Brown will not be chaperoning dances

Count me in with the group that pretty much refuses to have anything to do with high school dances.  In fact, I’m to the point where I laugh-out-loud at the very question of chaperoning a dance, even if it is asked by my students.  It’s kind of like asking, “Mr. Silva-Brown, would you mind putting your hand in this bowl of scorpions while Death Eaters come down and suck the soul out of you?”

This years MORP, PROM backwards, had the theme of Woodstock 1969.  MORP is traditionally the dance where people dress up and act goofy while trying to get in a dance.  As a historian, I was wondering what get-ups would classify as Woodstockesque.  On Saturday the pictures started to show up on Facebook.  I’ll take some of the failure as a History teacher for the outfits, I guess, because I don’t quite remember seeing rainbow colored get-up’s that made the girls look like they should be bringing people drinks in the Bahamas.  If they were really serious, everyone would have not showered or shaved for a week and the dance would have taken place in the rain on the football field.  Now that would be a real Woodstock dance. 

Mixed with the highly sexualized atmosphere is the constant “pre-gaming”, the act of drinking before going out for a night on the town.  Only students are pre-gaming before going to an event where they are actively looking for drinking.  This creates tension, needless game playing, and a much more dangerous situation for adults than is necessary for a Friday night.  Why deal with the risks?  Instead I can go eat sushi and kick back with my wife while watching a good flick.  Much more reasonable after a long week. 

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